Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
