Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Randomize
