Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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