hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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