IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize
