we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
