So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
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