I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
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Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
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Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Shame is for Republicans.
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