my mouth tastes like poor choices
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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