I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Randomize
