So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
