so explain again why im purple
no
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
