Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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