I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
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