No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Randomize