I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
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