we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I need a beard to bite.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
