remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
it's like heaven, but drunker
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
