Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
