I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize
