It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
meet me or not, i'm out of control
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
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