They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
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