At least make sure they are 18
Why
Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
