he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
