the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Randomize
