Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize