It's Friday. Sex?
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
