I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
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