I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I don't deserve a penis
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
I am available for nakedness
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize