If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
