Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
