Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I want a musical about memes.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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