if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
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