we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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