seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
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