I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
