idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
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