Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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