I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Randomize
