i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I'd cum for enchiladas.
This is my gift to your gina
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
