Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
so much tequila, so little girl.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
