My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
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