Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
