He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
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Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
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Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
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