Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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