32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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