Don't you send me to vm
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
Randomize
