haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize