i think my mom watched the whole time
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
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