Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
PANTIES FOUND
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize
