I hope mine doesn't look like that
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im calling her cock vulture from now on
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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